Oh, this is so hard to do at times. You are in love, you are a people pleaser. Everything else is good but one or two things. If you give him, her or them up, you will have no one and who wants to be alone?? The excuses are endless and through it all you are fighting your gut coz something just doesn’t feel right.
Let me assure you that when you stop allowing yourself to be taken advantage of, incredible things can happen.
Importantly, you will come to love yourself. If you are letting others take advantage of you, always trying to please them, keep the peace, put them first, change your plans – you don’t love you. I can hear you say but “I do love me but love others also” but is this really true? Do you really feel it within yourself? Are you treating yourself the same way you treat others? Are you taking your own advice?
Staying in a situation that is emotionally challenging can devalue you. Make a commitment to yourself that no matter the outcome, you will always value yourself first. Valuing yourself is not being selfish – it is placing as much importance on yourself as you do other people.
When you are committed to a goal, it shows you value your time and your life. It shows others they can’t walk all over you. When my eldest was a bub (over 20 years), I was addicted to Oprah. On her show she talked about the word “No”. Such a little word that makes some of us cringe – and I put my hand up to that one. She even took it one step further – saying no “fullstop”, no explanation, that’s it. I don’t know about you but as a reformed people pleaser, this still is hard to do. But give it a go, there is power in it. “No, sorry” to a friend who needs help or to your boss when asked to do overtime when you have plans. In all honesty, the reason makes no difference to most people – they are thinking of themselves anyway. This is valuing you; it’s not selfish, it’s necessary. Also shows you can’t be walked over – you have a life.
Walking away also shows you have other options and creates an abundance mindset – that you have enough, you don’t need anyone else. Two things happen when you do this – you find out who truly does love you and wants to be in your life but it also opens the door for new opportunities, new friendships, new loves.
Your two best companions as you value yourself – No and Direction. Take back control. Value yourself. Walk away if you need to – in the direction you want YOUR life to go!
YouTube has many great speakers you can listen to on the topic. The Power of Walking Away by Einzelganger is worth a listen https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1rV4kmUJko